Random Thoughts...

So im sittin here in my room trying not to feel some kind of shame for rocking out to the Jonas brothers and Stevie Wonder on the Grammys, but its not working! Im loving these little boys and the blind man more than i should. lol. Otherwise im ok, now... So i had to wig the F* out at work today. Crazy but i swear this shit was called for. Same asshole sup started in on me about some minor bs. Anywho, he told on me and i aired his little ass out... felt much better afterwards so moving on! So once again im super emotional right now. Katy Perry looks like shes putting on some weight.... yeah so, I wanna cry all the fraking time now. you know why? Because my (.) is almost here.....AGAIN! I swear im like buggin out every 3 weeks. Well not exactly. The symptoms come every 3 weeks like clockwork. Tired, cranky, emotional, bloated, cramps and plain old depressed. This aint no joke. Im seriously considering getting some prescription meds to straighten my nutty ass out. I literally cant cope under these conditons. Not when they're dick heads out there that wont leave my ass alone or simply act right. Its way too much to ask that people dont get on my nerves obviously. So i need to be my own solution...Cant be mad at that honestly....DRUGS! anybody got that? Katy Perrys outfit is so cool! I wonder if they can get that in my size? She's so Alice in Wonderland. OMG! Can Kanye let Estelle get some camera time lol.
Ok. So theres build a bear. Great concept! Now cant we put the idea to something more useful? Build a man!?... I like it! Its up there with no track weaves! Hey Valentines Day is coming up.... No parade this year. Some how the way my love life sits right now, i think i best lower my hopes and expectations. Maybe its the hormones talking but i just dont have the wow factor emotions going. The stars arent lining up right. On second thought...this could work in favor of the man... you see if i have low expectations, anything done or gotten will be magnified. Then again that could back fired....After the initial shock of the action or gift, i may come back to my stush senses and be like "its nice, but WFT?" Anywho... I been thinking. I must examine myself more closely before i analyze or form an irreversible opinion of the men i deal with. Natalie Coles dress is an off the rack mess!!! smfh So in order not to burn relatonships or get into problems that could be avioded if the right footsteps are taken. Im falling back. I already know im an emotional wreck every 3 weeks so i cant depend on a man to handle me with care. Truthfully i feel its alot, unfair to ask of anyone. I believe it would take someone that really loves me to be willing to deal with my ordeals 4 weeks out the month. Buttttt! I cant deny that thats what i want and truely feel i deserve. So heres the compromise! I will not judge or take anything away from a man who cant do that. I however will be committed to myself and cause of not settling. I think it sounds fair, probably should have realized this along time ago. I was too busy chasing shadows. Queen Latifa Looks amazing! MIA: NO THIS BITCH IS NOT 10 MONTHS PREGNANT and proforming Swagga like us!!! Unbelievable...but i understand... baby on the way gotta stack that paper... I just hope the baby dont fall out! Oh yeah! and the outfit is see thru!!! smh... T.Pain looks like Oscar the Grouch. I want some Loubinton pumps so i can put my cape on and stunt on these bitches one mo gin.
I did dinner for 1 last night...Sat night. It wasnt so bad. I didnt do too much. Alittle Rasta pasta... I had on uggs and such, cute. Dont you know had to beat them off with a stick! One fool even hit me with "Ma, I know I know you, whats your name?" really homie? worddd? thats all you got? We in a recession but G is free. I must admit, the shallow attention negated the lonesome meal. Im not a complete loser...I ordered my pasta to go. For all they knew i had a man at home that wanted to keep me in and only allowed me to leave out for our food. Spotlight. last thing on my mind....Ladies, you ever get frazzled when your boo dont call? what exactly does that feeling mean? That was retorical, we all know the answer. I got to wondering why it is that we have pick n choose standards. That is standards that vary based on how much we like the guy. EX: If he's fione... No job, no car, smokes plus I'll wait till he dumps his girl like he said he would. If he's ok... He needs to have a job and dress very well. If he's not the most physically attractive.... He must have a job, car, dresses fly, his own place and his running shoes on because he will still have to chase you down, despite all he has to offer. Our rules apply to some but not all. He dont call, you dont care. He dont call, your thankful. He dont call, your disappointed. He dont call, you call. He dont call, your staking out his house. Some things this one gets away with, you would never put up with from another. If John tried half the things Jason got away with, John would get quickly sent to jail with out passing go or collecting $200. So should you set the bar at an even level for all? Knowing if you did, Jason would mostlikely get cut. Its always the ones you have a soft spot for that make you challenge yourself to do right by yourself. 09, Im gonna do right by me.